Samantha has taken on the role of big sister in strides. At first she was tentative about being "replaced". Sam, especially during the pregnancy, showed signs of anxiety over getting lost in the shuffle as the delivery day came closer and closer. She became a little more detached and a little more argumentative. (The fact that she is 10 going on 14 may also be a contributing cause.)
During Chritmas vacation Sam learned that TJ is not always the focus of everyone's attention all of the time. Obviously TJ needs attention but that does not mean that it to the exclusion of attention to her. For example, Sam and I went kayaking one morning. When we were at SeaWorld we took turns riding the Kraaken with Sam while TJ sat on the sidelines. This winter Sam and I go skiing every Wednesday and every other weekend.
The down side is that TJ takes up so much of Lisa's time that Sam feels shut out. Sam's "girl friend" has less time to spend with her. Its hard to explain to a child that the situation requires Lisa being more involved with TJ over Sam. Its hard for Sam not to feel left out when she is only with us part time.
Samatha with TJ is amazing. TJ lights up when Samantha is in the room. At dinner TJ sits in his highchair across from his sister and smiles. Sam on the other side encourages the smiling with faces (that she turnes "off" when I look over to her - what she doesn't realize is that I can see her reflection in the window). Sam plays with TJ and goes out of her way to kiss him good night or say good bye to him at the end of the weekend. Sam wants to be involved with her brother (unless he is crying).
As a father to both, I know that I am blessed. I know the relationship between half siblings could be difficult and challenging. However, at the outset Samantha is doing great. TJ loves his big sister and Sam loves her baby brother.
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