Bad Boy, Bad Boy

This journal has long described the fun, quirky, and silly exploits of the Brown Family.  And those stories are all true. However, with all of the good stories there has to be some that are not fun to write.  This is one of them.  But if we are to be honest as a family then it needs to be told.


Like it or not, sometimes you have to face the reality of what is in front of you. TJ is suspended from school for a day for behavior that is considered - and written up as - bullying.  Today, our son is that kid.  

It is behavior that is so out of the norm for him and us as a family that it is blindsiding.  We do not label people by specifics such as race, creed, intelligence, or physical ability.  We might tease one another in the family but it is never mean spirited and we never tease beyond the point of a good laugh.  

TJ is picking on a kid in his class.  Just one kid.  And he is leading his class in the dogpile.  Whoever this kid is, the kid is not mainstream and is a bit of an outcast to begin with.  TJ has managed to further alienate the student.  

We all know this kid from our youth.  This is the boy or girl who was just different; too tall, too fat, too unattractive, too different from the rest of us.  We picked on them and marginalized them.  Some of us might have even been one of them. Back then we didn't have the resources to confront a bully.  Today, all of society knows about bullying and the damage it can cost.  Today, there are resources at home and in the school for kids who are on the receiving end of this behavior.

TJ is a sweet and gentle kid.  Even with his brother he exhibits a long fuse and a good temperament.  The fact that he has picked on this kid in school over the course of the year is just baffling.  While he is remorseful I am not sure that he has fully embraced how to walk away from the circumstances that could lead to a confrontation.  As he enters Middle School in the fall this will be a careful edge for him to walk.  He can be the center of attention as the class clown or the center of attention as a leader of doing the right thing.  He has the potential to go either way despite our efforts to steer him towards the latter.  

TJ knows I am writing this and is uncomfortable with the world knowing his business.  Maybe that discomfort is a good thing.  Coming to the realization that the world looks at you might help modify his behavior to conform to acceptable behavior.