Ahoy There!

2016 marks TJ’s 4^th year at Camp Sea Gull. It is a special honor to be able to share Camp with my son. I know what a magical place Camp can be and I desire that magic to rub off on TJ. Last year I questioned the impact Camp had made on him when his first remarks upon his return were, “Mom, next year can I go to a co-ed camp?” But this year, am starting to see the magic do its work.

TJ, Grant and I went to camp last weekend right before Starter Camp. It was the last day of staff training and the counselors were pumped. In typical Sea Gull training fashion, they have the “new guys” introduce themselves at the meal. As DD called up the staff to be introduced he also asked if there were any campers who “might” be in attendance. They too could introduce themselves. So TJ went up to the stage, waited in line and was the last one to have the mic. I was fortunate to get it on video.

What a way to build this kid’s self-esteem. Speaking in the mic can be a nerve-wracking experience, but TJ did it with ease. And then when the staff cheered, I am sure that he felt like a rock star. TJ told me afterward that he was nervous. I could not tell. I was thinking this was his first taste of stand-up comedy or theater. Thank you, Sea Gull staff for making my child feel important and be lifted up in such a positive way.

Later that day, we attended the Dessert Social in New Bern for Starter Campers and their parents. The majority of Starter Campers are new to camp and prone to be shy or apprehensive about the experience. I asked TJ if he could help out by talking with some of the new campers and answering any questions they may have had.  He really rose to the occasion. He spoke with parents and campers. He looked them in the eye and really gave good answers to their questions. Jon Vance even made a comment: “You have good boys. I really was impressed with how TJ welcomed new boys.” I was too, Jon.

It just goes to show when Camp gives children responsibility they take it seriously and deliver the high standards that Camp expects. I think TJ really liked being in that role.

This past weekend was Opening Day for 1^st Session and it is TJs second year for the 4-week program. He was so excited to get there, get settled, and have fun. He said to me on several occasions that “Camp is my home.” You have no idea how that got me. That truth speaks to me too. As we walked around Camp my heart burst with joy when other campers would scream out of their car, “Hey T.J.” and wave at him. He would respond back with their name and a smile. What a great community of friends he has created that over the years will grow deeper. 

I look forward to the letters home, the pictures on Bunk One and other counselor and director reports. I have a feeling this will be his best summer yet. 

"Watch Me as I Graduate"

We have yet another graduate in the house. . . . a preschool graduate that is. 

Yesterday was Grant’s graduation ceremony from Johnson Pond Learning Center. Our little 5 year-olds parade around in cap and gown and have a special ceremony while the moms and dads (okay, mostly the moms) marvel at how big they have gotten. “It seemed like only yesterday. . . . and now you are starting kindergarten.” is echoed over and over again.  The title of this post was actually the song that was being played as they processed around the sanctuary. 

I am all for milestones, nostalgia, and celebrating. But I am on the fence when it comes to an actual graduation ceremony for preschool. Here are my thoughts.

PROS:

These kids are performing during the ceremony. They sing songs on stage, have speaking parts, and are expected to be poised. They are learning stage presence and confidence amidst the nerves and fears. I want Grant to become comfortable on stage. I want Grant to understand the importance of poise and confidence. I want him to wrestle with being nervous about something, trying something, and experiencing success.

As a part of this performance, the songs they are singing were a part of the class curriculum since February. I love that my child learned all 50 states and knows a song that includes them all. I am proud that my child can also sing a song that identifies all the presidents. The graduation ceremony is an opportunity to showcase their knowledge. At least, with Ms. Pam and Ms. Alicia they started in February. When TJ graduated he sang songs like “The Wheels on the Bus”. (I still roll my eyes when I think about TJ’s preschool graduation and how mortified I was that TJs class was significantly less poised than Ms. Pam’s class. Of course I made sure that Grant would be with Ms. Pam).

Milestones. Closure. It’s important for the students and teachers. . . and I guess to for the parents. It’s about closing one chapter and opening, well, a whole other book. Many of the children have been at the same pre-school their whole—albeit short—lives. The teachers deserve some closure and offer a way to say goodbye. They are the ones who won’t be seeing the children again.

CONS:

Why are there “graduations” for every little thing these days? Why are we making our kids believe that everything they do is so important? Are we over-praising our kids? I kind of associate preschool graduation with the every-one-gets-a-prize generation I fear we are raising. It basically sends the message that you are getting rewarded just for showing up. That will not build true self-esteem; instead it builds this empty narcissism in our children who feel entitled to just about everything.

Caps and Gowns? Really? This is just for moms and dads to get misty eyed. We know that next time we see them in a cap and gown they will not be so small anymore. Or perhaps it’s the “hurry-up-and grow-up already” culture that is creeping in. We accelerate childhood today at alarming speeds. How old are children when they first wear bras, make-up and carry cell phones? What about when they first have boys and girlfriends? They are all examples of a culture that views children as miniature adults. We put them in a cap and gown now because it is cute and they can do what the big kids do. Yet under our breaths we say, “slow down! We are not ready for you to grow up so fast.” So which one is it? Can we have it both ways?

Regardless of the pros and cons, Grant's graduation was a nice way to celebrate this particular time in his life. The Browns are celebrating the freedom from preschool tuition costs as well as dropping the kids off at different locations (and pick ups too). That is, at least for the next two years. Then TJ will be completing 5th grade. Not so sure of the way FVES commemorates this milestone. But please, no cap and gown! 

Another Terrorist Attack. Another Senseless Use of Guns

Two days ago 49 people died at the end of a muzzle of a gun fired by a self proclaimed ISIS supporter.  It is the worst loss of life to a terrorist attack since 9/11. It is the largest mass casualty event since the Alfred P. Murrah bombing in 1995.

We have an identity crisis in the country and no one wants to come out of their respective corners to discuss it. In fact, these incidents only retrench our opinions.

It's difficult to imagine where all this is heading. Our reactions to a Lone Wolf attack and over reactions to it's response will only fuel the fire.

 

We can't do nothing.

We must do something.

The answer is somewhere between love and tolerance for all  or castigation/marginaliztion for some. One leaves us potential victims. The other makes erodes the unique fabric of this country.

Love your brother if you can. Arm yourself if you must. But don't think that gun restrictions/freedoms, deportations, or ecumenical peace will stop this plauge because those are the e-a-s-y answers and we can't even get to an agreement on any of them.

So many pundits, politicians, and social media opinionsters know the answer - or, more likely, know the answer isn't what the other side says.

And so we perpetuate this insanity.

God help us all.

Happy Birthday TJ!

You are my favorite oldest son.

You are a light, a source of joy,

and now you're nine years old.


You mother and I rejoice in your spirit.
We see you getting taller and more grown up
every day.


When you sing, when you dance,

when you do both at the same time,

our hearts smile.

Thank you for the love you bring

into this world.

All of who love you, love you because of
your gentle heart and mischievous ways.

There is so little behind you

and so much awaiting you in the years to come.

You are blessed

and we are blessed to have you.

That Was a Great Weekend

This is what a great weekend looks like in the Brown family.

Lisa signed me up for the inaugural Run The Quay "15k Challenge" which consisted of two races; a 10k through the Fuquay side of Fuquay Varina, NC and then a 5k over many of the same streets – on the same morning. The challenge was that runners had to wait between races. Since the first race started at 7:00am and the second started at 8:30am I had to wait about 40 minutes before the second start. That is a long time for muscles to be idle and build up lactic acid. Not to mention that the humidity was 100% and the temperatures steadily climbed all morning. Both races collectively kicked my butt even though in combined time I finished in 5th place overall and 3rd place for men.

Lisa signed up for the 5k, only, and despite a stumble that skinned her knee, she finished in little over 30 minutes. The boy also ran the Kids Run; a 100-yard dash and 1 mile run. TJ showed us that his true athletic ability is s-p-e-e-d. He started in the middle of the pack, won the 100-yard dash, and finished second in the mile race. That boy might be a track star if he wants to be.

We made it home and managed to go to the pool where Grant continues to make great strides in swimming. He now swims to the middle of the pool with one of us there to grab on to when he gets tired. He will be a fish by the end of the summer. Just a fish that doesn't like to get his face wet.

In the afternoon, we took TJ to Jump Street - a trampoline park in an old Harris Teeter grocery store. His friends, Evan, Nathan, Austin, Austin and Yalanie, plus Grant joined us. The big event there seemed to be trampoline dodge ball, although we did get a glimpse of Grant jumping off the tall ledge into the air cushion. Not once, but several times!

Still not done with our day, Lisa and I managed to get out to the Draftline for our last date night before I depart for Ft. Knox for a few weeks of work.

Sunday was Lisa's birthday. Yes, she knew her birthday present because she asked for a hammock from REI and was there when I got it. But she also hinted at breakfast in bed so I took the boys down stairs while she slept and I cooked bacon and eggs. The boys helped present it by waking her up to "Happy Birthday".

We went to the pool. 

We made some lunch.

We took a much-needed nap.

We headed up to the airport to pick up Samantha who is visiting for a week and then went to a Japanese hibachi steakhouse to celebrate Lisa's and TJ's birthday. I will mention here that none of the hibachi chefs were Japanese at all and were clearly from Central America. Domo arigato, Jose. Grant was front and center for the knife twirling and onion volcano and loved it and he ate mushrooms! 

Bellies full we returned home in the rain – Sunny Skies would have to take a rain check - in favor of Breyer’s Chocolate Ice Cream with Betty and Bobby, another round of “Happy Birthday”, 3 rounds of Uno Attack! and a group selfie on the couch.

Happy Birthday, Lisa Brown

Happy birthday to the best partner anyone could ask for in life.

We are raising a wonderful family, have great friends, and still find magic in little moments together. For the past twelve years you have been my friend, my rock, and the one I could count on when it mattered.

I'm going to attempt to reward you with breakfast in bed with the help of Grant and TJ.

I love you - happy birthday.

We Love Lucie

What a lovely picture to share with you all. With some coaxing Lucie got on the love seat as we enjoyed a glass of wine and warm evening sunset. She has become a member of the family and is the perfect dog for us. Well behaved and playful she fits into our temperament - you can see when she is happy! She sleeps at the foot of our bed. She can go on runs with us and loves being off leash in the big fields in the undeveloped section of our community. She is a bit of a scoundrel who loves water and mud [see what I mean here] but we don't seem to mind.

Best.      Dog.      Ever.

Freedom Balloon Festival and Memorial Day Weekend 2016

The Freedom Balloon Festival found a new home in Fuquay Varina this weekend.  We braved the early morning hours and late evening crowds to see the very best of the event. Good news for a little town just outside of Raleigh, NC.  

In typical "fair" fashion there were over priced rides, fat, greasy food, cold beer, and a lot of people. TJ and Grant wanted more rides and more food - but that's more an expression of our inability to say "No" to them more often. It's the one thing I don't like about the boys - enough is never enough. They get three rides but want five. They get shaved ice and shrimp skewers but still want more food - having left a cook out an hour prior. Parenthood; an on going experiment.

This was a great way to spend Memorial Day weekend. I was still fighting jet lag from trip to Jordan so I woke up TJ. We left the house early and watched the competition portion of the balloon fest. We returned with Lisa and Grant in the afternoon to catch the evening ascension and glow. In between we went to a cook at our neighbors house for burgers, hot dogs, and chicken. 

The heat and sunshine didn't deter us. Sunscreen, bottled waters and arriving after 5pm certainly helped! However, there were families there who had kept their kids in the sun too long and by the time the evening activities started those kids were d-o-n-e. The good thing about our family - if we make a plan to reduce those headaches it usually turns out well for everyone!

We ran into our friends Tammi, Alec and Tucker Newton at the festival and the boys played and wrestled and ran around as these massive balloons inflated with fans and propane flame. While the adults watched in awe the kids chased each other into sweaty messes. It was a really magnificent display and as the night grew darker more and more balloon rose into the sky until the entire horizon was full with color.  

On Sunday the weather turned for the worst but we made up for it with movies and games. We all went to see the newest Captain America installment as torrential rains passed over Wake County.  And, back at home, the boys discovered our old Uno Attack! game and we got it working again with a new set of batteries. We may have found our new family time event! With Sam coming to visit next week the game will be put to good use.

Monday - Memorial Day. It still bemuses me that people get this holiday confused with Veteran's Day. "Thank you for your service," is fine but on this day were member those who gave their lives - the ultimate sacrifice - for their country. Lisa and started our day with a run in 99% humidity with Lucie. We ended with a nice dinner with Betty and Bobby - a semi-cook out.  

Here comes the summer!