Merry Christmas 2011

It's the last day of the year in 2011.  We have just returned from the frosty north in New York after a long, long ride in the car from Washington, DC (more on that later).   We enjoyed a whirlwind Christmas with the boys and Sam, Andy and his family, and Tina and Neal and their son, Hanson.

Christmas really took hold of TJ this year, and now that he "gets it" was super, super excited on Christmas eve and was bouncing off the furniture.  I can only imagine this behavior amplifying in the years to come when both boys are ready for Santa.  We put on a small get together for the families on the street and had an hour of cocktails, milk and cookies, caroles, and topped it off with reading, Twas the Night Before Christmas.  We have been trying to find a family tradition that fits the holidays and this seems like it. I was spent by 9:00pm and fell asleep on the couch.

For some reason I was the first one up on Christmas morning and made sure that Santa Claus stopped at the house.  I was able to make coffee, start cinnamon rolls, and check Facebook before the other stirred.  We followed my mother's tradition of one-present-at-a-time and watched TJ's excitement getting his Bakugan toys and his Beyblade while Grant seemed thrilled with shiny wrapping paper.

We enjoyed a full breakfast and got on the road by 10:30am to drive to New York to see my brother.  This was the first time Andy had met Grant and the first Christmas with my side of the family since at least 2003.  The kids; Alyssa, Luc, and Samantha are all teenagers now.  Its scary to see just how big they are, especially when Alyssa can drive herself!  Seeing the three of them with the two little ones reminds me just how much I miss my parents. 

We celebrated Christmas with everyone on Monday after Sam joined us in the early afternoon.  Samantha really enjoyed her Harry Potter House of Slitheren hat and scarf set that the boys got her.  The cold and the wind kept us inside for most of the three days we were there and reminded us that we do not miss New York. 

We headed out for Washington, D.C. on Thursday to visit with Lisa's grad school roommate (and our maid of honor), Tina along with her husband and son. Three boys in a house.  Another reminder why we should not try for a third child!  TJ, 4; Hanson, 2; and Grant, 1; made the evening fun chasing one or the other to make sure toys were shared fairly and no one fell over, rolled down the stairs, or poked the other.  The adults spent the night drinking beer or very good bourbon and talking until we almost fell asleep on the the couch. 

Friday, we took the kids to the Smithsonian Air and Space Annex out near Dulles Airport.  The two smallest tagged along so the old roomies could catch up.  TJ ran from one plane to the next - especially the ones with g-u-n-s!  Of course, I was right with him!  There was a shuttle, a SR-71, a Concorde, and dozens of planes from WWII.  It was a really cool way to spend a few hours.

We drove home through a parking lot called I-95; an absolutely miserable experience from D.C. to Richmond.  I was not at my best. 

We are home!  We are cleaning and washing and tidying and sorting through a week of holiday stuff.  The New Year is less than ten hours away!  We pray for a safe and happy 2012.

Redemption

I have made many mistakes in my life.  I have fallen down to the point where I did not know if I could ever get up again.  I have seen the worst in man, and the worst in my self.

This holiday is about redemption and second chances for God so loved us he sent his only son to come unto this world to die for us.  What an amazing gift.  And while I typically keep my spirituality to myself, this is the night and tomorrow is the day to share the good news.

I have my second chance and I live it every day with a wonderful wife and three beautiful children.  In no small part thanks to the grace of God.

Merry Christmas to all. 

Happy, Happy. Merry, Merry. Joy to the World

Making Cookies!

Pretty Lights Outside

Pretty Lights Inside. Too!

Our Lovely Staircase.

TJs Pre-K Concert!

It's Time to Play the Music, It's Time to Light the Lights

I wonder what's in here?

I get the bottom half...

The holiday season is firmly upon the Brown household and once again we are working to catch up.

How does it get to be mid-December so quickly after Thanksgiving?!

We are now only a week away from Christmas - too much, too soon, too little time. 

Even though we feel like we are constantly being overwhelmed by events we have been busy. The first good news is that we got our Christmas Cards out. Wow. I think we set a record on how early the majority of them hit the post office. Good teamwork.

Next: outdoor lights are out. . . Rich started the process in November. We made an agreement that it would be much more pleasant to hang them when it was 65 degrees in Novemember as long as we didn't turn them on until after Grant's birthday. So we waited. Yet, the yard still seems to be a work in progress. TJ quickly exclaimed that he wanted as many lights as our neighbor. Sigh. If you ask mom, the neighbor crosses the line toward tacky, but for a 4 year old, I guess tacky is cool. So, mom acquiesced. There are now glowing snowman heads around our tree. . . and worst yet, they change color. Ugh!

The other major accomplishment is that we put up the tree! TJ was a big help this year with the hanging of the ornaments. He wanted to touch each and every one of them. Grant even did his part by trying to hang one of his toys on the tree. It was really quite cute. . .he crawled over and lifted up onto his knees while reaching toward the tree with his little wobble toy. Its like he knew what we were doing and he wanted to take part too.

Dad get's the top half.

He puts 'em up and I take 'em down.

Next, we made the ever important visit to see Santa. This year we went to Fort Bragg. TJ was a little shy at first sight, but when it was his turn he went right up to Santa and got on his lap. He knew the drill. He posed for a picture and then talked to Santa. Not so sure what words were exchanged, but I am pretty sure that TJ asked for bey blades, a laser truck (whatever that is), and bakugans. Then it was Grant's turn. At first, he had a deer in the headlights look of "where am I and who is this dude with the beard?" and then the tears came. He was not too happy being separated from daddy so quickly. We did the best we could with a picture and let it go with that. And we went to see Santa so TJ could tell him what he wanted and Grant could cry at the man with the white beard and big red suit.  Plus lights are up on the outside of the house (but we did that in mid-November).

This year, we are attempting a new tradition. . . a Christmas Eve gathering with the neighbors (yes, even the ones with the tacky lights). Cookies, cocoa, and a reading of the "'Twas the Night Before Christmas." We hope to even try some caroling. And Lisa already is scheming a day when the boys are a bit older to arrange a door-to-door caroling tradition too.

So, with a few days left until the big day, a lot of things are checked off our list. . . but some big things still remain. But isn't it always that way come Christmas?

In case you don't hear from us sooner, Merry Christmas and may the blessings of God be upon you in the New Year!

Grant Robert Brown is One Year Old

  

 Grant turned one on Thursday, December 1, 2011.

Ready for My Party

I'll get the specifics out of the way and let Lisa reflect on the what the milestones were.

Jessica and Emma!

Grant's birthday started with Lisa, TJ, and I coming into his room while he was still asleep.  He looked blissful on his belly, in quiet slumber.  We launched into "Happy Birthday" and Grant immediately sat upright and rubbed his eyes.  He turned to see the three of us singing to him and broke out a huge smile to greet us.

Mmmm, cake!  Frosting!

Mommy dressed him in a "My First Birthday" outfit and at the usual time we were all on the road to work, school, and the nanny.  We met up again at Moe's for dinner and Grant engaged everyone who would look at him with a great big smile as if to say, "hey, it's my birthday today!"  The rest of his birthday was quiet before bedtime.  Unlike a year prior, it was a generally quiet and simple day.

Can You Eat the Plate Too?

However...

On Saturday we had Grant's birthday party; a small hoop-dee-hoo get together.  Our invite list was small but significant in the people who have been important in our son's life over the last three hundred sixty five days.  Emma and Jessica, Grant's babysitters from Camp came up for the weekend.  They had only seen him for the last four months in pictures and at that time Grant wasn't even crawling yet!  The Newtons; Tammi, Alec, and Tucker came down from North Raleigh.  Ellie and Nika came from down the street.  Meredith, Grant's nanny, and her daughter also made it. 

Hooray!

Grant was awesome.  He understood, somehow, that the party was for him and that he was the center of attention.  He did not disappoint his fans.  He tore into presents and showed everyone his new ability to clap on request.

Grant learned about cake.  Cake is not just something you eat.  I turns out that cake is something you wear.  On your face.  On your clothes.

It's my reflection that it is a minor miracle to see your little boy bring joy to friends and strangers alike with nothing more than a big smile.   On this day - as with most every day with Grant - he caused a lot of people to smile and be happy.

Happy birthday, Grant Robert.

Thanksgiving 2011

Happy Post-Thanksgiving in pictures and words.

We drove to Orlando and stayed at Disney's Saratoga Springs Resort right next to Downtown Disney.  The kids are still too small to enjoy road trips the way Lisa and I do; looking for funny sights along the way.  Our latest is a bunch of billboards throughout Florida for a doctor who does vasectomies.  The ad isn't funny, but the picture of doctor - with one big, bushy unibrow is.  In fact its hysterical to think that the last thing you might see before you go under the knife is his eyebrow poking out over the top of his mask.  When you are driving for seven or eight hours you need to make it fun or you can really jeopardize the entire trip.  I am thankful that they boys travel so well and Lisa and I still enjoy the time in the car with them and one another.




The resort had two great pools with slides for the big kids; Lisa, Sam, TJ, and me and a great water play area for Grant.  Since we deliberately decided not to go into any parks (Disney, Universal, or Sea World) making the most out of the resort was key.  In true Disney form, we were able to have a great time with what we were provided.  The pools took up most of our time, Samantha, TJ and I went to the outdoor movie by the pool, and we all walked through Downtown Disney to get dessert at the ever crowded Ghirardelli Chocolate Shop.  In fact, Lisa and I got a nice morning run through Downtown Disney and  Grant even got in his first slide ever and it was a water slide!  I am thankful that we have our timeshare with Disney and the memories it brings.

We came across the Christmas decoration where Samantha had her picture taken in 2005.  It's hard to believe that the little kid from six years ago is this grown, young woman now.  She is TJ favorite and vice-verse.   Whatever bond those two have in their later years will be much stronger than between Sam and Grant.  By the time Grant is TJ's age his big sister will be in college and really turn into a mystery and an enigma who only visits once a year or so.  I am glad the boys have one another but I am even more thankful that Sam has TJ.

TJ got to visit Once Upon A Toy with just his dad as a reward for having dry pull-ups over night for five nights.  This is a big milestone for a child and he deserved something special for working on his "star chart".  He knew just what he wanted and didn't waste too much time locating the Star Wars toys. I see a lot of a young me in TJ; he's happy, funny, aloof at times, a bit of charmer, and 100% kid.  I am so thankful that he is turning into a good boy and great big brother.
 
That was the end of Orlando and we drove out to Homosassa for the rest of the week with Betty. 

Betty is in the process of moving out of her big house and into something more manageable - most likely here in North Carolina.  Lisa and I had our list of chores waiting for us once we unloaded the kids on grandma.   I really don't mind, and actually enjoy being a useful son-in-law, now that my parents have passed.   I thought I might have to take of my mom in her old age but she never got there.  Helping Betty is a close second.

We spent Thanksgiving dinner at Lisa's cousin's house in Clearwater, Florida.  The last I saw many of these people was in 2005 at Christmas time.  Although we are not all particularly close to any of them, we had a really nice time, too much wine, and plenty of food.  Grant entertained everyone with his new clapping trick and big grin.  The magic that boy's smile is how his whole face manages to smile.  His mouth opens, his eyes twinkle and squint, and his nose scrunches up.  It is wonderfully infectious and makes everyone around him happy because Grant will smile at everyone and anyone.

We had some "lasts" on this trip.  The last time we would see manatee from grandma's dock, the last time as a family at grandma's big house, the last time we'd go to the Homosassa Springs Wildlife Park, and probably the last time we'd see some of the family gathered around the dinner table.  Yet, you have to rejoice in all that you have and this year was no different.

There was a lot to be thankful for this year.  In fact - Grant is one year old now!  A blog entry in it own right after his party on Saturday.

 

The Gold Star Mother and My Dirty Little Secret

Veteran's Day on 11/11/11.  Ninety-seven years ago at the eleventh hour of the eleventh day of the eleventh month the guns fell silent and World War I was over.  The war to end all wars.

Last night I was out with some of my church buddies when a woman came up to us and wished us a happy Veteran's Day.  She assumed that the septuagenarian in our group had served (and she was right) and must have guessed by the haircut that I was in the military.   She couldn't have been any more than five to seven years older than me.  She was wearing one ID tag, more commonly known as a dog tag; a rounded rectangle imprinted with your name, social security number, blood type, and religious preference.  It is standard issue for anyone in the military. 

I asked her if she had someone in uniform and she said said, "Yes."  I thanked her for her service just as I tell people who thank me to thank my wife instead because the families carry the greatest burden of all when soldiers go off to war.  In reply she said, "I am a Gold Star Mother."  And there it was on her lapel, the noticeable crest of the Gold Star Mothers.  My stomach fell.

Gold Star Mothers area a very unique and very exclusive group of remarkable women.  The price of admission is more than any of them can bear because Gold Star Mothers have lost a child in war, and in some cases, more than one.  When we talk about sacrifice and service to the nation, these women are our touchstone. 

I was both honored and intimidated to be standing with this unassuming woman who told me in a calm and unfaltering voice that her son died last year in Afghanistan on his fifth tour; three in Iraq and two there.  He was an EOD (Explosive Ordinance Disposal) technician and was killed by an IED near a school.  She showed me his picture and went on about how many sons and daughters she has gained as a result of his death.  She now visits wounded warriors and helps them transition from the horrors they have encountered.  Her resiliency and dignity was remarkable but all I wanted to do was scream for her.  Scream the agony that she has felt for almost a year. 

I thanked her again - a futile and almost empty gesture on my part because there are no good words to address her loss.  I drove home shaken by the encounter.

I am a Soldier as was my father and grandfathers before me.  I have come to realize something as I watch programs from Iraq, or look at my pictures from two tours in Iraq; I love it.  Not the country, the heat, the people - but being a Soldier and going into harm's way.  If it were not for my family I would go back.  Today. 

There is no easy way to describe this feeling and only those that have been there can understand it but I have never felt more alive, more in-the-moment than when I am out walking on some Iraqi street or sitting in the open bay door of a Blackhawk flying 800 feet above the ground moving at 110 mph exposed to all of the risk that those moments pose.   I even get that feeling in an airborne operation in the seconds before I exit the door of the aircraft.  At times I wish I were a younger man and could do it over again. 

What the hell is that about?!  I wish I knew. My taste for an adrenaline rush does not exist here in my comfortable life and I am quite content with being boring (no BASE jumping, bungee cord jumping, or alligator wrestling for me).  And yet, as I said, if not for Lisa and the kids, I would trade in the comfort of cable and beer and a big warm bed to be out there in full "battle rattle," head on a swivel, ready to meet and engage the enemy.

Maybe it is not just the danger but the feeling of being a part of something bigger than your paycheck and more valuable than your worldly possessions.  Maybe its putting twenty years of training and experience into real world application and applying it in a place where making a mistake has immediate and long term ramifications.  Maybe it is the challenge of the art and science of war as a profession.

I.  Just.  Don't. Know.

To all my brothers and sisters out there past and present - be safe, God bless, and thank you all.

Halloween 2011

Halloween 2011 was a weekend long event this year filled with zombies, parties, and Grant's first Trick-or-Treat.

Zombies! Run!

The festivities began on Saturday morning when my neighbor, Tom, and I ran in the inaugural Fuquay Varina Strafe Zombie Run; a 5k through streets filled with the undead.  Unlike normal 5ks this one was more of a game where runners were given flag-football flags and began the race.  Along the way the zombies would ambush the runners and try to grab the flags.  For every flag you lost it added seconds to your finish time.  For every flag the zombies got they earned points.  There were "health" flags along the way which took time off your finish.

The Running Dead

The hour before the race witnessed the worst weather of the year.  It rained with temperatures in the forties; cold, wet, and miserable.  In fact 15 minutes before the race it poured and the zombies began to wonder about hiding along the race course and getting soaked.  (Very out of character for a zombie).  Lo and behold, as about 70 of us "survivors" lined up for the start, the rain let up.   However, the showers left behind huge puddles to avoid in addition to the undead.


The race began the first few zombies seemed to just come at us with that foot-drag-undead-shuffle that zombies are famous for.  The running pack was still pretty bunched up when we turned the corner and were set upon by half a dozen zombies sprinting at the crowd!  "Panic" hit the crowd.  Survivors zigged while the undead zagged.  Flags were ripped off and still the race continued.

Running a 5k is relatively easy no matter what shape you are in.  You find your pace, go, and settle in for the course; six minutes, ten minutes, thirteen minutes per mile - eventually you will get across the finish line.  When you add zombies trying to chase you down you then find yourself having to sprint.  Often.  When you least expect it.  All the zombies have to do is stand there and wait for you to come at them - and then they chase you.  It adds a dimension to your race that kicks your butt.

Well, I lost my flags - heck, I could have had ten flags and it wouldn't have made a difference - but I managed to finish third overall in about 22:10.  I am looking forward to next year!

What Costume Party?

BBQ Stains and Mascara

Saturday evening we packed up the boys and dish full of sausage and peppers and headed to the Newton's for a costume party.  Lisa and I waited to the last minute to come up with our costumes and, while in Wal-mart, decided to dress like Wal-mart shoppers or Jerry Springer guests.  I bought a "wife beater" tank top and then proceeded to clean the car engine with it, ripped a hole in an old pair of jeans, and found a hat to complete my look.  Lisa was sporting pink leopard print velour pants, a tank top with her bra straps showing, and a big set of hoop earrings.  Naturally, she ends up looking great and I end up looking like a regular on "COPS".

I love dressing up and poo-poo the folks that don't play pretend just for one night.  Really, get into the spirit and have some fun!  For one night a year you can be funny, scary, sexy, creepy, or just plain wrong (i.e. the pregnant nun get-up). 

Samantha reported in from New York that her Halloween consisted of going to bed early.  I guess 14 year old lack the little kid joy of dressing up and walking around in the dark - too juvenile.  At least she wasn't out egging the neighborhood.


Dragon and Dragon Tamer



Two years ago I made TJ's Halloween costume - the famous firetruck - and since then I have become the default costume maker for the holiday although I have no more creativity than Lisa does.  Our original theme for this year was going to be "The Incredibles" because TJ looks just like Dash with his hair slicked back.  Samantha would have been Violet and Grant Baby Jack-jack.  Unfortunately, we couldn't find red spandex for all of us and the idea withered in the days leading up to the weekend.  The question became, what to do for TJ's costume.  TJ is a fan of "How To Tame Your Dragon" and I was inspired to cut a brown bath mat into a animal skin vest with a shield, axe, and Viking hat from the dollar store and things we had on hand. TJ has a warrior's spirit, so anything with a sword, axe, or gun is absolutely fine with him.   

Not So Fierce Dragon


Grant's costume - well, every Viking needs a dragon to slay, or in this case, tame. Using our imagination and some things around the house we made Grant's dragon suit.  With a little brown duct tape, aluminum foil, and a painted wings we had the perfect little dragon who was less fierce than he was friendly.

It rained on Halloween evening - in fact it poured with temperatures in the fifties - and we were about to give up on going around the neighborhood.  In our family friendly little subdivision only two kids came to the door before 7pm.  What a bust!  Last year the streets were full of kids!  Then our friends rang the bell!  It was TJ's friend from down the road!  It stopped raining!  Lisa packed up the boys and headed out for a walk around our lake, hitting the houses along the way.



Halloween 2011

Somehow the word got out that Trick-or-Treat was on and soon the door bell was ringing all the time.  While the rain kept a lot of people inside our house had it's fair share of cops, witches, and super heroes.  And - our boy(s) managed to fill their bags! 



For the last two years our Halloween decorations have been in storage in New York.  We just haven't found the the room in a vehicle to get three big bins of plastic jack-o-lanterns, tomb stones, decorations and a fog machine down to North Carolina.  Hopefully next year will be the year that the kids walk with trepidation towards our front door as creepy music echoes from the windows and mysterious shadowy figures lurk behind drawn blinds...

Happy Halloween to all you creepy creatures!





Kid Updates

The end of October is upon us!  Ghouls and goblins are getting ready to fill the neighborhood and our leaves are just starting to change here in the capitol area of North Carolina.  The backyard is full of pine needles and the trees are turning yellow and red and orange.  It's still not the same as Cortland, but since Cortland has snow right now and we do not, I am fine with this version of autumn.

Grant is happy go lucky as always.  He's quick with a smile and a twinkle in the eye.  He has quickly learned what a camera is and immediately knows what to do when it is pointed at him. 

Sam had a tough day on Thursday.  What started out as cramps turned into abdominal pain and possible appendicitis requiring a trip to Urgent Care and then the ER.  Five hours and one ultrasound later the doctors ruled out a burst appendix and leaned heavily towards an ovarian cyst which is painful but otherwise benign in nature.  Of course the look on her face tells a completely different story.  She is better and off to compete in her last Crew Regatta of the season. 



TJ is ready for Halloween.  Inspired by "How to Tame Your Dragon" TJ is a version of Hiccup, sporting a shield, axe, Viking helmet and a bath mat turned into a animal skin vest. Creativity hit us at the last minute and thanks to some crafty work and visit to the Dollar Store we had success!

Next issue: The Halloween Story

Boy's Night In

Lisa is out for the night which means I get "Daddy Duty."  That consists of diapers, dinner, playtime, TV time, and bedtime.  I can't complain about any of it because Lisa gets the lion's share in parenting when I am away for the Reserves.  

When people ask what I'm going to do with the boys I always say the same thing, "We're gonna strip down to our underwear, set a bonfire in the living room, and sacrifice a small, stuffed animal," to which I am usually met with  look of horror or humor.  

I enjoy the daddy time and the ability to play with the two of them.  Of course, it's hard right now because their age differences don't allow for a lot of group play.  TJ is okay playing with cars or spaceships or planes and Grant is into everything that TJ just put down.  The boys have never appeared selfish of their parents attention when they are focused on the other and so far the "That's Mine" mentality has not kicked in and we know enough to keep Grant away from his big brother's favorite toys.  

However, this afternoon was about naps; TJ took a 2 1/2 hour nap and Grant went down for 30 minutes.  Grant and I watched "Planet Earth" while I multitasked with the dishwasher and let TJ get some good rest.

To my credit, I don't take the easy route and go out to dinner - well, maybe once in a while.  I cook dinner while the boys are occupied on the floor with toys.  Thank goodness they are so easy going in general and with one another because it allows me the ability to get dinner on the table with the least amount of frustration possible. This evening was left over chicken breast with sauce added and mozzarella cheese.  That and some penne and vegetables made for a nice dinner.

After dinner I thought we'd go to the computer and have some fun with the Photo Booth and almost peed myself laughing with some of these pictures.  Big Brain Baby is my favorite. 

Now the boys are in bed and I can straighten up before Lisa gets home.  I like for her to come home to a clean and neat house because I want her to think I can handle both boys and the chores and make it look easy.  There are dozen things I could do; although drinking Maker's Mark and writing in the journal seem to be at the top of the list right now.  

I better go put the fire in the living room out.