Say Yes as Often as You Can

 A neat thing happened to Grant, and I last night!  

While Mom and TJ were in Virginia looking at schools, Grant and I decided to ditch making dinner at home and go out for dinner.  Our first choice was sushi but both places we went to were closed on Mondays, so we ended up at the Aviator Smokehouse for wings. The Aviator Smokehouse makes some of the best wings around - smoked first and then flash fried for a little crispiness.  Yum.

As we were leaving Grant noticed a man in the Aviator's event space and said that he looked a lot like a YouTuber, Jake Weddle, that he follows.  I told Grant that the place was hosting a Comedy Night and it might him.  We confirmed it - Jake Weddle was on the bill!

Here is where parenting can be fun. The easy thing to do is say that it's cool and continue on to the car and go home. Sometimes parenting is all about just getting home to unwind. Being a parent, saying "No" is so much easier sometimes. However, a few years ago, I made a choice to say "Yes" more often and so I did the quick calculus and asked Grant if he wanted to meet the guy.

I went into the space where they were having the show and politely asked Jake if he would do a nice thing for a Veteran on Veterans Day and say hello to a teenage fan.  he eagerly agreed and posed for a couple of pictures with Grant.  

Teenagers can be so "been-there-done-that" who cannot be impressed by anything. Tonight, however, Grant was grinning ear to ear having met a famous person.  

I loved being a dad in that moment.

Perfect Memory

The Fuquay-Varina Middle School Football team just completed its first perfect season in almost 30 years! 

Letting Grant play football was a parenting challenge for us. He never played on a youth team. He might be tall, but he is skinny. His hand-eye coordination is average at best. However, last year he made his case and we agreed to let him play.  

Last year he didn't play much - for all of the reasons listed above. However, this year, as a 8th Grader, Grant got more playing time. Grant usually played on Special Teams and once an a while as a Receiver.  Knowing my son as I do, I could detect the ever so slight hesitation in him running into someone at full speed and hurling his body into them.  Grant was an average player but a great teammate.  He always supported his team and fellow players and even earned the coveted postion of "Bus DJ" with his tune selection.

Grant knows that his future probably does not include football and will very likely involve running.  Grant is a very good runner.  However, for two years he was football player.  I love that for him.

There is so much I cannot remember from Middle School. My memories are of dances at the Middle School, realizing that girls exist, and  that awkward time of adolescence.  I certainly didn't participate in sports aside from Little League Baseball - and I wasn't good at it at all.  

I hope that Grant holds on to this memory. Years from now, I hope he remember that year, way back in 2024, when they opened the new Fuquay-Varina Middle School and he was one of the first students to walk the halls and his coached worked the team hard to go 7W-0L.  

Go Bengals!
 

PR for the Win

TJ's High School Cross Country career is almost over, but not before setting an incredible PR that set a new Willow Spring School record but most likely also propelled the team to win the Conference Championship!

TJ always has a solid performance when he runs. Compared to you and me, he is astoundingly fast. Compared to his peers, he is in the top 10-20 of the runners in his meets. As good as he is, TJ is not overly competitive. He has been caught several times, chatting with his rivals, catching up on what they did over summer break, or even encouraging them to run up that Wake med hill.  He knows this about himself. His coach knows. His parents know. It is frustrating because he does not push himself to reach his maximum potential.  

And then, once in a while, he lets all that go and does the incredible.  The greater Neuse River Conference meet was at Wake Med Soccer Park. It is a course TJ knows well.  Down the hill, through the woods, back up the hill, around the park and into the woods again, and finish up that hill! My advice to TJ is the always the same, go out fast, find your pace, and finish strong. Yesterday was no different.

I try to work around work and go to TJ's senior year events. Work does not need me to sit in front of screen as much as my son needs to see that his dad cares to see him compete.  Lisa is almost always there.

TJ started his race and went out strong. Lisa moved to the bottom of the hill and I positioned myself at the halfway point. As he came up the hill at the one-mile mark he was in the first three runners and looked good. His other teammates, the ones who are usually ahead of him, were a good 30 seconds behind. I thought there was no way he could maintain for another two miles. Right?!

There is about 10 minutes between the first run up the hill and the second run up the hill to the finish line. With shouts of "here they come," the runners came out of the woods and TJ was still in the top three and shoulder to shoulder with another runner. My excitement was bursting, and I screamed for him to push the hill. I looked at my stopwatch as I watched him head to the finish line. I couldn't see the finish line, but I could guestimate - and I hit the red STOP button.  It read 16:36. 

I ran to the finish area. TJ was on the ground as most runners are after 3.1 miles at their top speed. I helped him up and hugged him. I told him his time. He couldn't believe it. Neither could I. He was almost 30 seconds faster than his best time. His time was faster than is buddy, Jack, ever ran for the school. 

TJ set the Willow Spring High School Cross Country record.  

The next ten minutes were filled with joy, incredulity (literally a Holy $hit moment), and cheers. Lisa came up the hill and hugged TJ. His teammates were blown away by his time.  The Willow Spring Athletic Director high fived TJ.  TJ was having his best day ever.

I am not entirely sure how scoring works, but I am pretty sure that his finish put the boys' team into First Place for the first every Conference win and a new trophy for the case at the school. At least that's the story we will tell.

The Dog is Going to Get Spoiled

Twenty years ago, I loaded my gear, boarded a C-17, and several hours later found myself in the middle of Baghdad, Iraq for what would be a long year at the start of the Iraqi Civil War. That first deployment would mark a major change in my military career and my life.  Sometimes it seems like not that long ago. I can still feel the heat of the end of the Iraqi summer. I can still smell the fetid open sewage and rotting trash.  I can still hear the "whump" of mortars coming into the base.  Then I remember that in those twenty years, both my parents passed, I got married, had two wonderful boys, watched Sam get married, and I retired from the Army!  It's then when I realize that 2004 was a long time ago.

2004 was so long ago that Samantha grew up, went to school, and became an Army officer - among other things. Being the father and retired "Senior Army Leader" of a young officer, I have to walk the line between sympathetic listener and dispenser of sage advice.  

Shortly after Sam and Mitch got married, they announced that they were buying a dog. A puppy to be exact. A Golden Retriever puppy. A whole $2400 worth of puppy. Prior to getting the dog I dispensed my fatherly advice, "Now is not the time to get a dog. You are both very busy with your careers and the Army could send you both away at the same time." I followed up with, "I am not watching the dog if you get deployed."

 

Do. Not. Get. A. Dog.

So now, of course, the fucking dog is our guest for the next three months because both Sam and Mitch are away from their home for extended military duties.  

Yes, Sam is deployed in the Middle East. Twenty years after I deployed, she is now living the life that I remember so well.  Sam tried describing her base to me.  I stopped her and said I could describe it to a T without ever having been there. T-Walls? Check.  Generators droning somewhere nearby? Check. Container Housing? Yep. Sunshades, connexes, gravel parking lots, NTVs? Got 'em all. Sam is away learning how other places in the world work through the lens of military operations.

Buoy is a very well trained, two-year-old Golden. She is a big, clutzy dog that laps up water everywhere when she drinks, comes bounding into rooms with reckless abandon, and pulls on her leash. She plays with her toys and somehow shoves them farther under the couch than she can reach. She knows shen you are eating something and will sit at your feet and stare. I call her 78lbs of dumb and 2lbs of super smart. She brings an energy to the house that our ten-year-old dog, Lucie, does not have.  

Samantha, being who she is, sent Buoy with operating instructions. Two pages of when to walk the dog, how far to walk the dog, training commands, plus all of the feeding and veterinary information.  

 

Now are lives are filled with a temporary addition that seems like grandparent training. I don't follow the instructions, I spoil the dog with table scraps, and let her bark when Lucie barks.  I think of it as giving a grandchild a chocolate cookie and Coke after 7pm before returning the toddler to the parents. And, you know, that's what you get for not following dad's sound advice. 

 

Woof! 

The Toilet is Smoking

Grant almost got me one this one.  His sense of humor is funnier that either of his siblings and rivals mine.  His is better because there is thought that goes into his jokes.

I had only been home from Kentucky for less than 24 hours when he came into the kitchen to state that the toilet was smoking.  He said it, but could not keep a straight face as his cheeks started to turn upward. I was just entering my what-the-eff-now state of mind when I saw him conceal the smile so I played along.

The toilet is smoking. 

Stogies apparently.   

Good work, Grant.  Good work.

Adulting - Graduate Level

Twenty years ago, I packed by duffle bags and in a few short weeks of training, medical updates, and briefings, found myself in Baghdad, Iraq. Lisa and I were only engaged a few weeks at the time. Samantha was seven years old. We departed each other's company at Syracuse International Airport. I distinctly remember Samanth running past security to give me one more hug. I remember a lot of tears, even from bystanders. I was something right out of a movie. 

Over that summer in 2004, everything changed for me in meeting Lisa. Our whirlwind courtship opened up a whole new world for me. Then I left. Everything I loved back in New York. 

I remember getting into Baghdad in the middle of the night. It was hot. I was tired. I was scared. I was scared not so much for myself but for the family back home who would worry about my safety.

The deployment passed. There were moments of terror and some personal trials of leadership under fire. Through it all, I had the light at the end of the tunnel of seeing Lisa and Samantha and my family again.  Somewhere in late June 2005, we all happily reunited.

And life fast forwarded twenty years. We married. We moved to North Carolina. We had children. We grew up - including Samantha who went on to graduate from a prestigious university with an Army ROTC Commission. 

Samantha stated her military career as I ended mine and I watched her grow as a young leader in the 21st century's new Army. She and I are able to talk our business language, and I can pass on some of my lessons learned. 

Earlier this year we learned that Sam was going to deploy. My heart both rose and sank at the same time. It rose knowing that she was going to go into harm's way and learn firsthand some of the lessons I learned.  Some stories can be told. Others require the experience. 

Earlier this month I took her to her unit at zero-dark-early. Flooded by sodium lights, families gathered in the parking lot as Soldiers moved gear into trucks and exchanged last hugs.  So, this is what is feels like to say good-bye from this side. Sam was in work mode, a convenient excuse to not get bogged down in the emotions of the situation.  I was in let-her-do-her-thing mode for the same reason.

She kept her phone on for a long time. Long enough to watch her plane taxi on the runway heading to someplace over there.  There was a heavy sigh. It came from me.  

Welcome to graduate level parenting and adulting.

 

Almost There

Wow. How giddy am I right now?!  

Here is the back story: 

With a big summer ahead of us, Lisa in her new role at Meredith College, TJ starting a real paying job as a Camp Counselor, Grant heading off to Camp for a month, and me heading to Kentucky for a summer assignment, there isn't a lot of down time for Lisa and me.  A modern family with teenagers, we are busy!

Nonetheless, I was able to find three days on the calendar for Lisa and me to get away after the boys were gone and before I go to Ft. Knox.  I hinted to Lisa that we should use our Disney Vacation Club membership to go to Walt Disney World for a few days and spend a day at Epcot. Lisa said yes under the condition that we could stay at the Polynesian Resort - a very exotic, and very hard to get resort. Lisa picked it because she hung out in the resort's lobby back in February when I ran the Disney Princess Half Marathon.  She commented along the lines of, "I want to stay there!"  I went on the website and was Waitlisted - the Disney equivalent of "nice try, but sorry, no."  Then two days later I received an email that our reservation went through for a suite with a view of the lake and Magic Kingdom!  This was a win. 

However, as they say in the commercials, "Wait! There's more!"  

Moving forward, I made reservations at some awesome Epcot restaurants. Pizza in Italy. Steak in Canada. We even scored a reservation at the Villian's Lair, a DVC member only lounge at the top of Bay Lake Tower about thirty minutes before the fireworks at the Magic Kingdom. Everything was looking up for a short and wonderful DWTK (Disney Without the Kids) trip.  

Then came Tiana's Bayou Adventure. 

For the uninformed, Tiana's Bayou Adventure replaces the former Splash Mountain, a log flume ride with a 50' drop. Splash Mountain was problematic with its theming - or at least the history of the film the theming was taken from, Song of the South - and it was ready for an update.  Honestly, retheming the ride based on the Princess and the Frog makes perfect sense. The water, music, and characters from the movie easily fit into a get-wet ride. 

The refurb has been closely watched by Disney Files for months. Because it rises high into the sky it is easy to see over the construction walls around it and fan pages and blogs are full pictures and theories of the ride's story line.  There are official videos out there demonstrating the state-of-the-art animatronics.  Then, Disney released the official opening date for the end of June. 

This week Samantha told me that DVC members have an opportunity to preview the new Tiana's Bayou Adventure, two weeks before the official opening. And it turns out, it is on one of the days that we will be there! 

Fittingly, Juneteenth. 

I found the registration page and with nervous anticipation, I watched the timer on the window count down from the 3 hours and some odd minutes when I first entered it to 0:00 and was redirected to the website. Starting at 352 in line, I watched the number quickly go down until I was in and entering our information and clicked submit.  

We. Got. In.  

It makes me grin just thinking about it. Disney has always been a member of this family. The Brown family has had many wonderful memories with Disney: races, cruises, vacations, holidays and even nights in front of Disney+. We are looking forward to another one very soon! Some of the very first people to ride a new Disney attraction!

In fact, we're almost there!

March of the Penguins

It was a week for the penguin suit!  

Lisa is always able to find a gem of a deal.  She found a formalwear warehouse that sold gently used tuxedos and gowns for a third of the price of renting one! She bought a nice black tuxedo for TJ for his prom and I was so intrigued by the idea that we went back the next week and bought one for me!  Although I have the option to wear my military uniform for a formal event, I am trying to distance myself from that persona. A $100 tuxedo was a great idea.

On Saturday, Lisa and dressed up for the Inaugural MMIA Gala. Lisa crushed it in her black dress (and Texas hair) and I wore my new grey tux. I tried the suit with a red bow tie but I looked like Pee Wee Herman. Once I did the voice, Lisa gave me hard No. <Laughs like Pee Wee, "Ha, ha, ha.")

Six days later I was in another tuxedo for my brother's wedding in Florida! The rental company initially dropped the ball by giving the suit to another customer named Brown but recovered by emergency FEDEXing another one in less than 16 hours. Thankfully, the remeasured me and suit I picked up fit better than the one I would have gotten. 

Twenty fours after Andy's wedding we had driven back up I-95 to home to see TJ and his friends get dressed for their first prom.  Coming straight from a Track Meet, TJ got ready at Zach's house with Jack and Owen. All of the parents were patiently waiting downstairs until TJ called out to me for help with his cufflinks.  It was then I looked at all of the boys and realized none of them had their cufflinks or buttons on...because no one had ever showed them! 

After a little help they got it figured out and came down looking their best for pictures by the pond before heading to dinner and Marbles Museum for their prom.  No dates, this is 2024. Everyone goes with friends and very few couples go together. However, I did ask TJ if he was going with a girl next year and he replied, "that's the plan."

Looking good in the neighborhood!

The Coronavirus: The Multi Day Project in 24 Hours

This was my Christmas present from Samantha. I love to build Star Wars Lego sets. It gives me a sense of calm and focus and challenge that comes from most hobbies. I love to sit down with a beer or a cup of coffee and go through a few bags of the kit.  However, with Covid, and it being Dry January, all I had was coffee and a lot of time on my hands. 

Luke's Land Speeder Master Build kit - almost 1900 pieces in 13 bags.  These models pull you in. It is hard to simply stop once you begin a bag. It is hard to stop when you know the next bag is going to give the kit more definition like a cockpit controls or engines.   

I started early on Saturday morning...

 

...and finished the main body by bedtime.

The nose section was ready before breakfast the next day.

The engines were done by lunch.

I was done before dinner on Sunday. The kit was massive in size for a Lego set, over 19" long and 6" tall on the stand.  

It was a long quarantine in the office, and I wasn't planning on building the kit now. I certainly didn't plan on doing it in about 30 hours.  

My post Covid project is to find a place to display it.

The Coronavirus: Covid at Home!?

In 2024 it seems a little anti-climatic but we have a positive case of Covid in the house.  

My symptoms started maybe on Sunday, but definitely Monday. I was lethargic and stayed in bed most of MLK Day. I felt good enough to go to work on Tuesday but felt a downward spiral in the afternoon.  By Wednesday morning I knew there was something wrong and called into work sick. I ran out an got tests for everyone in the house and came home to go through the motions of swabbing my nose, adding the drops, and waiting for the inevitable.

I now know what what people were talking about during the height of the pandemic. My whole body hurt on Wednesday. Not like a soreness from a workout where you lifted or exerted too much. No, this was pain throughout my whole body.  I did not want to get out of the bed - even thought I was sequestered to the office pull out.  That lasted through most of Thursday but subsided by the evening.  Fortunately, those were the worst of my symptoms. I had no problems with my airways! 
Friday has been a long day in the office watching if anyone else gets sick - so far so good. ...and binge watching shows like I never have before; including a couple of funny episodes of "I Love Lucy." 

I am looking forward to the end of this when I can sleep in my own bed, run again, and rejoin society. 

Your Life on the Small Screen

 

A quick note to my kids; something to take a small pleasure in as you reminisce as you read these posts.

I addition to blog posts, your dad had a small side hobby in making home videos for us - for you.  I hope you find them years or decades later and remember things like the time we went to Family Camp, or Spring Break, or - most recently - a surprise Disney Cruise.  

You need to know that while it was a fun way for me to be creative, in a mediocre way, the purpose was (almost) always to give you something to remember the years when you were toddlers, or kids, or teenagers, and a time when your parents were still young and vital.  

Your mom and I made DVDs until a time when everything went on YouTube.  There are some fun memories out there for you to discover. 

For a short time, I thought I would be one of those social media influencers. I made a Disney Race Tips video, and it got a few views. I made videos of Disney Resort lobbies and pools and those had views.  I thought I might be onto something but then realized that LOTS of people are already doing this as more than just a hobby.  I had neither the time nor the inclination for that. The movies are there for you. If someone else likes them too then I don't mind at all.  

I can't really apologize if I shoved a camera in your face, or if I made an embarrassing movie of you. It was all a labor of love.